Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy Works

by Cynthia M. Braden

How does a therapist decide what modality to use or which theoretical orientation to follow?  Research has shown that Emotionally Focused Therapy works well with couples. I have been using this modality for the past few years and have found it to be very effective in helping couples regain their closeness. 

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When we are in training, therapists study many different treatment modalities. Here are some them:

Freudian Psychoanalysis
Jungian Analysis
Behavior Therapy
Cognitive Behavior Therapy
Rational Emotive Therapy
Trauma Focused Therapy
Family Systems Therapy
Sex Therapy

Expressive Arts Therapies (music, art, dance, etc.)
Hypnotherapy
Mind-body therapies
Choice Theory
Reality Therapy
Narrative Therapy
Psychodrama

That's just the beginning...

I started using Emotionally Focused Therapy because it is a highly researched, effective and evidence based therapy. It helps partners learn to reach out to each other more effectively, increasing openness, empathy trust and connection.


It helps address the core questions we often ask ourselves about our most important relationship:

"Do I matter deeply to my partner?"
"Will he or she be there for me when I need them most?"
"Do I fee safe and secure enough in this relationship to be my full and authentic self?"

These questions are often at the root of what couples fight about - the emotional bond and the safety and security of the relationship. When we feel that the answer to one of the above questions may be "No" it can cause us to feel isolated and afraid.

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Private Couples Workshop
$1200 (Save $25 per session)

You and your partner receive:
Eight sessions including 2 individual sessions (one for each partner) and 6 couples sessions

75 minute sessions
(15 minutes of additional time per session)

Save $200 with package rate and lock in your discount session fee of $150 for any future sessions booked


8 sessions expire 12 weeks from date of purchase.
Insurance will not cover this service.

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Here is a list of some of the things we do in Emotionally Focused Therapy: 

• De-escalate negative cycles of interaction
  
• Identify negative feedback loop patterns
  
• Access unacknowledged emotions
  
•  Learn that negative cycles of interaction are the problem' instead of, 'my partner is the problem' or 'I'm the problem'
  
• Change interactional patterns and create new bonding 
  
• Learn to re-create positive feedback loops

Emotionally focused therapy doesn't have to be with a 'couple' only. A mother and daughter or family group, even friends or business partners who are having trouble communicating can benefit. Statistics show that this type of therapy has a success rate of up to 70%. 

We learn how to create a safe environment so we can talk about what's going on inside of us... to share our inner world with our partner. We also learn how to  express ourselves more effectively so that we feel 'heard' and the other person doesn't feel attacked. When this is working, we dare to come close again... we feel like our partner 'gets' us.

The next part is key... We also learn how to replace criticism and blame with appreciation and negotiation. You'll be surprised at how easy this might be for you and how much better you'll feel. 

At one time you had a great positive feedback loop going. We can try to get that back for you.
New skills and habits can be developed. You can be happier.