Be Like a Bee… Get What You Need (part 2/2)

by Cynthia M. Braden, MFT

I can't have that because...

That's not going to work because...

I can't do that because...

That will never happen to me    because...

Exercise Review: Identify Limiting Beliefs

In the first parts of this exercise, we asked you to notice and write down the things you want in life, and the reasons you believe you cannot have them, and consider the validity or objective truth of these beliefs. 

In other words, fill in the blanks for the statements above next to the white flowers. These are your Limiting Beliefs. Understand and realize that you Believe in these statements! You are consciously or unconsciously giving your faith, belief and emotional energy to the truth of these statements which reflect the opposite of what you desire. 

For example, My husband doesn't love me anymore, we'll never get back to the way we were. That is a powerful emotional statement that sounds like a fact.

So, I want to challenge you, How can you know that this belief is absolutely true?

Maybe you have received a great deal of feedback from your environment that tells you it's true. However, if you can find one single exception to the statement, then it is not universally true and you can decide to stop believing in notions that are false and do not serve your purpose. Ouch. I'm believing in things which are not even true which continue to bring me more of what I don't want. 

Relationship dynamics are shifting all the time. I cannot know that our relationship will never improve. If I'm believing in that, I'm needlessly headed in the direction of hopelessness.


Next section… Adopt a Reframe